Good morning. It’s Friday, March 21th, and these are some of the subjects of interest to me. I’m just giving my brief takes, some more elaborate ones. Feel free to disagree, and I won’t mind in the slightest. I think it’s a good morning to start off with some Corey Taylor. Damn. You can feel his pain in this song.
Uneducated Press Secretaries
It’s probably the job that nobody wants. Don’t get me wrong, I get that. But, like it or not, you’re the face of the administration, and you must put reason and be reassuring to the American people. When your Press Secretary has this response….’ that France should be thanking us otherwise, they’d be speaking German.’ Video below
Oh, the irony of historical ignorance wrapped in a blanket of misplaced patriotism! The Press Secretary’s claim that France would be speaking German if not for the United States is about as accurate as saying baguettes are made of freedom fries.
Let’s break down this comedic masterpiece of misinformation:
The Timeline Tango
First, the United States didn’t even join World War II until December 1941, well after France had already fallen to Nazi Germany in June 1940. By the time Uncle Sam showed up, the French were already practicing their “Guten Tag” and “Auf Wiedersehen.” It’s like claiming you saved someone from drowning when they’ve already been treading water for a year and a half!
The Resistance Rumba
While the US was still debating whether to join the party, the French Resistance was already hard at work, sabotaging Nazi operations, gathering intelligence, and generally being a thorn in the German side. These brave men and women were fighting for their country’s freedom long before American boots hit the ground. They were the original “French Connection,” minus Gene Hackman and the car chase.
The Soviet Samba
Let’s not forget our friends to the east. The Soviet Union bore the brunt of the Nazi war machine, suffering massive casualties and eventually turning the tide of the war. While American contributions were significant, ignoring the Soviet role is like forgetting to mention the iceberg in the story of the Titanic.
The British Boogie
The Battle of Britain in 1940 was a crucial turning point, where the Royal Air Force prevented a German invasion of the UK. This happened over a year before the US entered the war. The British were holding the line while Americans were still deciding whether to RSVP to the war invitation.
The Linguistic Limbo
Even if Germany had won, the idea that all of France would suddenly start speaking German is as ridiculous as expecting Americans to start speaking British English after losing the Revolutionary War. Spoiler alert: they didn’t, much to the chagrin of grammar enthusiasts everywhere.
In conclusion, this statement is a prime example of what happens when you mix historical facts with a blender and a generous helping of nationalistic pride. It’s a recipe for a hilarious, if somewhat misguided, word salad that would make even the most patriotic bald eagle facepalm with its talons. Perhaps the Press Secretary should consider a career in alternative history fiction – she certainly has the imagination for it!
John Wick: Ballerina
The full trailer for John Wick: Ballerina has come out. I’m ready for it. Take my money. I love action films with strong female leads—enough of always being the distressed damsel who needs Mr. Muscles to save her.
Scott G.
I’m a fan of Scott Galloway. He makes a lot of business sense, which he should, as he’s a Professor of Marketing and Business. His partner on the Pivot podcast, Kara Swisher, is hit or miss with me. Scott appeared on Anderson Cooper discussing tariffs, of all things, and making the point that in business school, they used to laugh at when they did tariffs back in the day and how bad it was for consumers.
Film Fun – Jaws
An interesting movie note about one of the most iconic thrillers in cinematic history, the classic film Jaws. It’s fascinating to consider that there was an alternate take of the shark’s first terrifying appearance that ultimately wasn’t used in the final cut. In this original scene, audiences were supposed to witness the enormous great white shark arise dramatically from the depths, surfacing with shocking force to devour a young child who was innocently floating on a life raft. Producers were understandably concerned that such a gruesome and graphic depiction would be deemed too horrific as a first encounter with the shark, potentially overwhelming viewers and setting a grim tone for the rest of the film. This decision led to a more suspenseful buildup that has since become a hallmark of Jaws, highlighting the tension and fear associated with the unseen terror lurking beneath the waves.
Have an excellent Friday.